Conversion

Rabbi Keren Gorban

Welcome to Temple Beth El and the process of exploring conversion to Judaism. Choosing Judaism is a serious undertaking, and it is a process that most find deeply meaningful and transformative. 

As a guide (sometimes called “sponsoring”) rabbi, it is my obligation to be certain that you become Jewish with a strong foundation of basic knowledge. Judaism is a complex and intellectually rigorous tradition. Don’t worry; you don’t have to have mastery of it to become Jewish! However, you do need to know something about several key parts of the tradition, even as we encourage all Jews to make Jewish learning a lifelong practice.

You also cannot become Jewish without having gone through a process of serious reflection, something that you will do on your own and with me in a structured way through conversations and assignments.

To help us do this well, I have prepared the following process and expectations. We may make adjustments along the way to suit your particular needs and interests.

Expectations

1. Before setting up a meeting with me:
   • Attend two or more Shabbat or holiday services at Temple Beth El and introduce yourself to me.
   • Read Here All Along by Sarah Hurwitz, Choosing A Jewish Life by Anita Diamant, and/or Choosing Judaism by Lydia Kukoff.
2. Connect with and fully participate in the local Jewish community. Attend Shabbat services at least twice per month, all major holiday services and events, and several social activities. During our time together, you are expected to take a deep dive into Jewish life. You may or may not choose to continue practicing in this way after you convert, but this is a time for exploration and gaining experience. You should have had a variety of Jewish experiences prior to conversion and feel comfortable in Jewish spaces.
    
3. Engage in Jewish practices at home. At a minimum, this should include weekly Friday night Shabbat rituals and holiday celebrations. We may discuss additional home-based practices depending on your interests.
    
4. Enroll in and attend the Introduction to Judaism course or a course that is equivalent in instruction hours and depth.  University courses are a wonderful source of knowledge but are not acceptable as a substitute for a synagogue or community-based class taught by rabbis and/or cantors. If you are in a long-term relationship, your partner should attend the course with you, whether they are Jewish or not. Nobody will ever experience any pressure to convert; the purpose of this policy is to help support you in setting up a household in which Judaism may flourish.
    
5. Attend meetings with me and complete the readings and assignments, including regular journaling (prompts will be provided).*
    
6. Come to each meeting with an agenda for our time together, including questions about the reading, items for discussion, and/or journal responses. Please email this in advance. 
    
7. At the conclusion of our learning sessions, write a 1–2-page personal statement detailing your story and reasons for choosing Judaism. This statement, along with short (1-2 paragraph) responses related to 5 of your journal entries, will be shared with all members of the beit din before your time with the beit din. I also hope you will find this formal reflection a meaningful personal exercise.
    
8. Once you and I agree that it is time, we will coordinate to find a time for the beit din and mikvah immersions. We will do both rituals on the same day. The beit din will include me as well as two other clergy from the greater Puget Sound community. For the mikvah immersion (in a special pool or body of natural water), you will have to get completely underwater three times while fully naked. One of the members of the beit din will serve as a witness to ensure a complete and kosher (fit) immersion. The witness will observe certain practices to allow you to maintain as much privacy and modesty as possible. We will discuss this more when the time comes.
    
9. Please tell me if you require assistance with or would like to discuss the process of brit milah (circumcision) or hatafat dam brit (the taking of a drop of blood for those already circumcised or who cannot be circumcised). Please discuss with me if and how this ritual might be meaningful to you so I don’t make assumptions about your body or gender identity. I have experience working with transgender and non-binary people who are choosing Judaism and will always strive to be a supportive ally.

A few additional notes:

1. The process of conversion usually takes at least a year from the first meeting with a guide rabbi. Often, it’s a multi-year process. Each person and their journey are different; I support you on your journey with no expectations of adhering to a specific timeline.
    
2. You are, at any point, welcome to decide that conversion to Judaism is not for you or that you want to work with a different rabbi or cantor. Please do me the kindness of letting me know if you do not want to continue working with me.
    
3. Different guide rabbis/cantors have different expectations and requirements. Consistent among us is the expectation of learning and practice, as well as involvement in the local Jewish community, although the details vary.
    
4. Even with the variety of expectations, you should only be required to do work that develops your own spiritual growth and learning. While you are welcome to volunteer to help the community, you should never be expected to do anything as part of your conversion process that specifically benefits the guide rabbi/cantor or takes place in the privacy of your or their home. There are rabbinic and cantorial ethics guidelines regarding conversion—if something feels off, reach out to the Ethics Committee of the guide rabbi/cantor’s professional organization. My professional organization is the CCAR and the Ethics Code can be found here.

* Temple Beth El has a Pathway to Membership option for those seriously engaged in the conversion process. With a tax-deductible financial contribution to help sustain the congregation, you get full access to our community, including time with the clergy, the ability to register children for religious school, and member rates for classes. If, after our second meeting, you are still interested in conversion at TBE, you will be expected to make a financial commitment and get on the Pathway to Membership. As soon as your conversion is completed, you will automatically become a full member.